I forgot to read out the second last paragraph of Greg’s comment (which summed up the whole video when you think about it)... hence it being highlighted at the end.
Friday, May 29, 2020
When the right thing feels wrong
We can’t escape the consequences of choice, but what about the blindspot of consequences that follow a positive choice?
Sunday, May 24, 2020
Becoming someone else
I think that often people recreate themselves completely (and lose the good parts as a consequence), instead of just fixing the SPECIFIC problem that was always causing the issue.
Women are work
Relationships for a man tend to resemble the gym... you put in a lot of effort upfront in the hopes of all your hard work paying off. But unlike the gym, or most other things you invest effort into, there is little guarantee of ANY benefit from today's romantic relationships with women.
Sunday, May 17, 2020
🔴 Tomorrow is not always the answer
Very often we find ourselves sleep-walking through today, with faith that 'tomorrow' we'll actually start living and (finally) being happy. I've talked to many friends who share the same experience. We procrastinate through our present day, and then (as we brush our teeth before bed) we're motivated for the tomorrow. Effectively repeating the last night's naive optimism.
Religions look forward to paradise happening after death. The average procrastinator looks forward to the future also. Why do we do this?
🔴 Express your thinking better - Sharpen your acuity
The importance of communicating your thoughts well can't be overstated in my opinion. With the decline in literature, reading books, and even writing, I've noticed people's ability to communicate their thoughts well and clear is declining.
I think this plays into the hands of the system, in that, if you can't be confident (as a man especially) to project your values through speech in a clear way, then you become more and more silent. Think about it, most men are psychologically 'hamstrung' when a woman speaks and confronts them. So consider how much harder it is for a man to defend himself (with words) if he's not practiced in articulating thought eloquently and clearly... he doesn't stand much of a chance in today's times of 'soundbites' and 'memes'.
I think being a sharper man is the key.
Think better. Speak better. BE better.
🔴 Respect or love?
As a man, may I suggest focussing on respect BEFORE love...? Really, if there's one thing I would have taught a younger version of myself, it would be to expect more from women (and myself beforehand).
I realise that it's easier said than done. Especially the younger you are. But consider the consequences of not TRYING to have some standards for the intimacy you'd like in your life? You end up letting everyone into your home and life and loving them before they're worthy of being loved.
I've done it a few times myself. So I'm not preaching from a perfect record, but rather from experience... when you stand up for your standards and values, and the person shows they're objectively worthy of your respect and love, then it's MUCH LESS LIKELY they'll betray you.
🔴 Wanting her to be the one
Idealising women into your future because you WANT them to be there. I've done this common thing a few times. You really like her, and you think you've "found the girl" who'll be the one who'll fit that role you've always wanted... the girl who'll make you stop dating.
In some ways, the more experience with women one has, one can often "force" her to be the one for you simply because you're tired of looking. I've certainly felt this in older life. I simply don't want another "ex" girlfriend anymore. I'm tired of it. My friends and family are tired of it too.
🔴 Judge her like a friend
When I suggest to judge her to as a FRIEND, I know many people's first reaction will be, "But huMAN, you trust her like a friend!", to which I say, "Good, that's the point".
The idea is to judge people that you hold dear (or want to) with clear and higher standards than you would a complete stranger. After all, if she's going to be the closest and most intimate companion in your life, one would hope you can trust her in that role.
🔴 ISOLATION and INDIVIDUALITY
The man wanting to 'fix' a bad situation can often go to extremes. Cutting oneself off from life is a common tactic. "I won't get hurt here!" one thinks. Well, sure, but you also won't experience a lot of things either. And look, I'm not shaming anyone who is seriously happy, content and zen in that place... but from what i see and hear from men, THAT guy is as rare as bigfoot.
A reveal is how angry or forceful they communicate their (so-called) freedom and isolation to you, "I'm great, OK?!!!!!" ... and i'm also aware that i may be doing this sometimes with my own videos where I'm trying to make sense of my own life and decisions. But I try to do it calmly, for in that manner, I'm better able to sense whether it means anything beyond a nervous longing.
🔴 Stand up before you run
Eager to get to the tenth step, many are too impulsive and try to leap-frog all the steps necessary in between... You need to stand up before you can walk or run (let alone fly).
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A recent comment under a video said, “Only Boomers and Christians date”, and I have to wonder whether I can argue with this perspective, gi...
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Not that you need to be with anyone, but during these isolated times, are there things you miss from relationships?
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Our ancestors had more foundations in their day-to-day lives. Maybe we’re so insecure because we don’t.
